Healing...

It had been some weeks of minor turmoil for myself as I had to deal with death, 'abundant life' and my coping with these two rather conflicting items that occasionally want to grab my attention.

So, I thought I would just get away a bit and give myself a treat away from the pressures of conflict and headed towards the Bay to soak in the flora and fauna of the Gardens. The trip was refreshing and managed to heal some parts of my humanity and, at the same time, got to use my Gardens Annual Pass (individual).

Super Trees and OCBC Sky Way

The displays and flow of plants, trees, flowers including the panoramic sites that are available there were soothing and quietening elements that gently cleansed whatever that was the tsunami of emotions inside of me.

What I couldn't express properly for healing, the Gardens there helped put things in perspective, in its own unique manner. Whether death or life, it is important to understand how precious life really is and there is no effective value that can be placed upon a life that is lived out well in God.

Life as we encounter it may not be perfect but it has to be seen as one that is unique and sustained by God, no matter how messy it may be. Because it is sustained by God, all troubles will certainly see its day and will soon pass - those, too, will soon pass.

(more pics here)

Muddling Along...

Image by Annoysius via Flickr

It has been rather difficult lately to put up entries here on a more regular basis. Most of the time, it has got to do with the availability of time and the mood to do it, which has been rather erratic thus far. Most of the time and effort have been diverted toward managing and balancing the activities of the ministries within this parish that I am currently attached to and the teaching stint at the Seminary.

With the recent changes in the parish and awaiting for the new parish priest to begin his new posting from 1st October onwards, there have been much positioning and movement in some of the ministries as they await expectantly for whatever that may transpire with this change. I, myself,am in this transition period as I await to take over whatever responsibilities that will fall upon me as I take over the office of Fr Luke as he makes his way to his new parish at Star of the Sea.

In this kind of situation, it can be very unsettling when one cannot do much and feeling a little lost, in this midst of change. I still have much of my stuff (important) kept elsewhere and unable to unpack fully yet. I expect to do somehting about that after 1st October. Till then, I have to still muddle along....

While muddling along, I am expected to already be equipped with the skills to do retreats for some ministries and groups, in the parish and outside, who have approached me for a piece of my knowledge and sharing - knowledge and sharing, of  which I am still in the raw and learning through myself! It is the label that I carry of having being a product of Rome, of someone who has been through some great studies experience and can now impart the knowledge to others. It's not too bad a label to be stuck with but I don't believe it should be looked upon as one to be greatly fawned over.

Still, the parish do need a more directed sense of way to move, in the changes that are happening, and it will be their priests who ought to provide some semblance of stability and vision for all concerned, so that the parish can move and grow into a Spirit-filled and vibrant community. It is not an impossible task but a challenging one nonetheless.

On that note, I must say that I am not feeling that overwhelmed at all since my return to parish life, to all the activities associated with it, but rather am happy and satisfied, in a low-key way, as to the manner my new life in my ministry at IHM has unfolded thus far.

Not 3, Not 4

Image via Wikipedia

In the nexus....

That's how I am feeling lately. It is the neither here nor there feeling that doesn't give an air of finality to all that I am doing. I walk the fine line between reality and the twilight zone. I feel my hands are tied andthere is nothing much I can do about it but to ride this thing through.

Meantime, parish and seminary work continues and they provide some sense of vitality to the ministry which otherwise can seem rather stultifying with just the Masses, even if the Mass is the most important time of the day for any priest to undergo. Nonetheless, I would certainly feel better when I can have a certain stability to hang on to. It also make it difficult for me to render any appropriate commitment to the needs of the groups and/or people of this parish for fear of changes later on.

I am beginning to understand how Abraham, in the Old Testament, must have felt when he was asked to uproot hs family and home to follow a direction which God will reveal him, but only in stages. Of course, that great figure of the Old Testament encountered much more trials and challenges that my own cannot compare to them! All the more then I must learn to be patient and allow the pedagogy of God to teach me how His plans will unfold - mostly in ways I know not.

Taking Deep Breaths...

Image by F8th via Flickr

I think I am running on adrenaline here since my return because I have been doing things around the parish almost non-stop without having been able to stop for a deep breath! :-D

Just yesterday, I had to present a session for the RCIA as they started off on their catechumenate. It was a 40+ minute presentation on the first item of the Creed - God, Father and Creator. Along the way the were 2 funeral masses which saw me going also to the crematorium. This parish goes the whole hog with the funeral procedure, as they don't use 'funeral ministers'. So, you go to their wake to do a rite to tranfer to the Church for the funeral Mass, have the funeral Mass, then follow the hearse to the crematorium to complete the sending off.

However, in the midst of all this bustle and the flurry that usually comes with parish life, I have managed to retain much semblance of patience and understanding for whatever shortcomings and limitations that usually arises from situations such as this. Living in Rome, with their utter stupidity and inefficiency, helped a lot as I am much more accepting with the superlative (in comparison to Rome, that is) way things are done here, even if they do sometimes cause some inconveniences along the way.

I do this by way of a little exercise I usually tell my penitents to put into practice: stop a bit, take a deeeep breathe and count slowly 1 to 5....