Not 3, Not 4

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In the nexus....

That's how I am feeling lately. It is the neither here nor there feeling that doesn't give an air of finality to all that I am doing. I walk the fine line between reality and the twilight zone. I feel my hands are tied andthere is nothing much I can do about it but to ride this thing through.

Meantime, parish and seminary work continues and they provide some sense of vitality to the ministry which otherwise can seem rather stultifying with just the Masses, even if the Mass is the most important time of the day for any priest to undergo. Nonetheless, I would certainly feel better when I can have a certain stability to hang on to. It also make it difficult for me to render any appropriate commitment to the needs of the groups and/or people of this parish for fear of changes later on.

I am beginning to understand how Abraham, in the Old Testament, must have felt when he was asked to uproot hs family and home to follow a direction which God will reveal him, but only in stages. Of course, that great figure of the Old Testament encountered much more trials and challenges that my own cannot compare to them! All the more then I must learn to be patient and allow the pedagogy of God to teach me how His plans will unfold - mostly in ways I know not.