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Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Not 3, Not 4

Oil on canvas.Image via Wikipedia
In the nexus....

That's how I am feeling lately. It is the neither here nor there feeling that doesn't give an air of finality to all that I am doing. I walk the fine line between reality and the twilight zone. I feel my hands are tied andthere is nothing much I can do about it but to ride this thing through.

Meantime, parish and seminary work continues and they provide some sense of vitality to the ministry which otherwise can seem rather stultifying with just the Masses, even if the Mass is the most important time of the day for any priest to undergo. Nonetheless, I would certainly feel better when I can have a certain stability to hang on to. It also make it difficult for me to render any appropriate commitment to the needs of the groups and/or people of this parish for fear of changes later on.

I am beginning to understand how Abraham, in the Old Testament, must have felt when he was asked to uproot hs family and home to follow a direction which God will reveal him, but only in stages. Of course, that great figure of the Old Testament encountered much more trials and challenges that my own cannot compare to them! All the more then I must learn to be patient and allow the pedagogy of God to teach me how His plans will unfold - mostly in ways I know not.


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4 comments:

Unknown said...

'I walk the fine line', sort of lesser evil. I guess why you always go the safer path. Good to see you moving.

Mocha said...

Hi Fr,

I think you're doing great plunging into the swim of things barely days upon your return.... many others would have needed a longer transition after being away for 2 years!

Yours is a feeling we can all identify with as change is the only constant in life.

It's the same in the working world. Where do I go from here? Do I want to stay on in this company or even this industry? What are the implications if I leave right now while still pursuing my course? I guess I've to wait for next March before making a decision.

It's not easy going to work everyday, knowing the amount of fire I have to fight but I believe if God puts us to it, he will put us through it. I've to live for the moment and just do my best.

Anonymous said...

hi Fr,

while you are just abt to settle in nicely, Fr. Luke is going again.. this time to OLSS parish.. so quick.. just 2 yrs he was here in IHM taking over Fr. Brian D souza. and now he's going off..

What i like abt Fr. Luke is his homily.. gets you thinking.. and some reflections.. and his English is almost to perfection.

Fr. William is coming from queen of peace. Any other priests transfer ?

tessa said...

Being in this "amorphous" state of unknowing/waiting ( at least for a short while)gives one the luxury of not having to strive towards any decision - it can be calming if you're patient & allow yrself to drift with it .. In fact, will help to make more keen your senses, once you "re-surface" to the present moment & you'll be "raring to go.."

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