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Sunday, December 09, 2007

Sheer Grace

A star (the one that twinkles in the skies...) once said: I know a lot about love... seen centuries and centuries of it. The only thing that made watching your world bearable, in all those wars, the pain, lies, hate, made me want to turn away, never to look down again. But, to see the way mankind loves.. I mean, you could search the furthest reachest of the universe and you'll never see anything more beautiful. Yes, so, I know that love is unconditional, but I also know it can be unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable and strangely easy to mistake for loathing... my heart, it feels like my chest can barely contain it, like it doesn't belong to me anymore. It belongs to you! And if you wanted it I wish for nothing in exchange. No gifts, no goods, no demonstration of devotions, nothing but knowing that you love me too. Just your heart... in exchange for mine.

Over some friendly exchange of news concerning the happenings in Singapore over a well known Internet messaging service, a friend mentioned that her good friend is getting married soon. And in St Mary's, no less! :-) This couple who is going to celebrate their wedding, have only met and decided to get married all within a year or so. I told her that I wonder if her friend knows what she is getting herself into. She said she thinks they would be alright together. I replied saying that time will tell...

I've had my fair share of celebrating marriages and sending couples off onto their new life during my stint as priest in a parish that has the holiest of family to bless anyone that come under their roof. However, I know love is not unconditional unless it is truly given away to the other with nothing asked in return. I also know that I have one couple whose marriage I celebrated in church, some years earlier, did not turned out with a 'happy ending'. This was despite all the preparations, EE, etc that were put in to prevent such a thing from happening. I will always carry this sad burden of mine as a reminder that perfection, or at least human perfection that we so desperately search for, has too high a price to pay.

Turning to what the star mentioned earlier on its head, I see a twist in seeing just who really is saying that to the beloved. It happened more than 2000 years ago and continues to do so even today. If you are quiet enough and can remain still for just a moment, you might just capture that 'sheer grace' which wants to impinge upon your life to change it, so that you can truly love like he does - unconditionally...

1 comment:

Natasha Yong said...
Thanks for the prayers!


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