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Saturday, June 14, 2003

Just Trying to Be Me
Running around like a headless chicken the past week with my preparation for my coming ordination and also firefighting the problems of church groups whom I am looking after. For that intense moment in time there was too much of emotions running high and many a times I had to rein in my frustration and temper. It was painful counting of one to ten in a very, very slow fashion till I could recollect myself and say, 'it's OK.'

When prayed for some consolation and asking for released from these frustrations, I received an answer this morning from a parishioner over a cup of coffee. It came out as an affirmation that though was said by her but I know it was an answer that could only came from the Lord.

Meanwhile, this day was the only time in 5 days that I could actually sit down and be at peace without feeling all tightly wound up. I could even talk with longer sentences and not grit my teeth and mouthing in monosyllabic grunts and noises. That's what happens when you get to finish sending out all the invite cards to the people you want to attend the ordination and the dinner. Did that over two days and with two different 'chauffeurs' in tow.

There is still much work to be done and many more firefights to encounter. It will not get any easier. At least I can have the consolation of being able to still stand tall, albeit maybe with a little limp, in this rather 'demanding' parish after all is said and done. My stint with 'The Apostle' under the ACT (Theatre) Group, some 9 years ago, may did me some good in preparing me for this parish. I had a part of Stephen the first martyr...

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